If you told me to jump in the waters off Coney Island for the new year I would have replied to you with profanity.
I wouldn’t go into the waters off Coney Island during an NYC heatwave so why the hell would I take the plunge after a major blizzard just rolled over the city?
I told Rafi Kam that shit was #stuffwhitepeoplelike
Rafi Kam is a true believer tho’ and he said that the waters off Coney Island would bring the IC’s good ‘Chea’ for the new year.
I was still a serious skeptic tho’. Mainly because all the real Black people had on coats and scarves.
I told Rafi that if I didn’t see any ‘real’ Black people going in the water I wouldn’t do it. I wouldn’t want to be trying something that is culturally opposite what I’m supposed to do as a Black man.
I wouldn’t want to Crispus Attucks‘ my shit on the first day of the new year. That’s never a good look.
The boardwalk was an official freakshow too.
Rafi then spoke to me from the heart…
The water had no prejudices. It would be just as cold for everyone. It was in the icy, near- freezing waters off Coney Island that we would all be equal.
White and Blacks freezing their nuttsachs and tittyballs into ice cubes. Together.
Rafi also got to show off his post-Ghetto Big Math body. He’s doing amazing things with his new nutritional program. Kudos to the Kamster.
Rafi’s mom came to meet us with towels after the swim and then invited us to her home for a post-swim brunch. Mrs.Kam knows how much Coney Island polar bears heart herring and mackarel (and caviar too FTWWW!)
Mrs Kam calls me Douglass, and Frederick Douglass >>> Crispus Attucks. Is all I’m sayin’.
Our post-shoot meal was fantastic and refreshing. Mrs.Kam was a magician in the kitchen and she brought out a new dish what appeared to be every five minutes.
Mr.Kam regaled us with stories of his youth and his polar bear excursion while living in a kibbutz in Israel.
Mr. and Mrs.Kam were true believers themselves. It was immediately obvious where Rafi’s resolve comes from.
The Internets Celebrities have started the new year winning by going swimming.
The lesson for us all here is to just take the plunge in 2011
Happy new Chea, Internets. Now stop being racist.
Special thanks to Din-O and Chocolate Snowflake